Monday, February 11, 2013

An Aren't We Naughty Guide: Anal Sex for Beginners

By Symone Nelson

Anal sex can be intimidating for those who haven’t taken part in it before. If you’re looking to try anal play for the first time this guide will help you get well on your way.

Comfort and Relaxation 

Great anal sex takes a great deal of comfort, a lot of relaxation and trust in your partner.

Getting your body into a completely relaxed state will help loosen up the anal muscles for ease of penetration.

Popular belief is that anal sex is always and 100% of the time going to cause pain and that is false even in the case for beginners.

Streem Master
Sex in general should not hurt unless you want it to.

A lot of the concerns many have when first venturing into anal sex are physical ones. How do I look down there? Do I smell okay? Is this sanitary? These are often thoughts that distract the mind from enjoying the moment you are having with your partner.

To help ease any anxieties you can use an anal douche and take a hot shower before the act.

To have pleasurable anal sex you need to let go and allow only your desire and arousal to be present.




Foreplay
Foreplay helps a great deal in getting into a relaxed state of mind. 

Taking the time to slowly and sensually tease and get your partner revved into arousal will make the experience more enjoyable. Anal sex is definitely not something to be rushed.

Stimulating the anus orally and/or manually before penetration is extremely important for a beginner. Getting your partner accustomed to the feeling of you being back there can help them decide if they are ready to move up into penetration or if they need more time with just stimulation.

During foreplay you can use flavored lubes and sprays to add some fun to the play.

Intimate Organics Lube

If you or your partner have a more sensitive anus or just need some help relaxing the area, then something like the “Bottoms Up desensitizing spray” is perfect.

The spray has a mild numbing agent that numbs the anal area to aid in decreasing any kind of discomfort you may feel.

Also practicing before the actual act can allow you or your partner to discover how you enjoy being anally stimulated. You can discover different pressures, speeds and depths that you may like.






Lubrication
Every successful anal encounter needs lubricant! Lubricant does the rest of the job that relaxation does not. The anus does not produce natural lubrication like the vagina does and therefore needs the extra help.

Going with lubricants made specifically for anal sex such as Rear Entry Anal Lube is your best bet. Anal sex specific lubes are usually higher in viscosity and do a better job of coating the area you use them on with greater lasting power.

Keeping the area lubricated at all times creates less friction and more pleasure for both the giving and receiving end.


The Right Equipment
Anal Beads
If your anal play consists of toys, then make sure you find the right one for you. As a beginner you want to choose toys that will pleasure you but also make you feel the most comfortable. Taking on too much at once will ruin the experience. I suggest starting with the smaller and simplistic anal toys and working your way up as you and your anus become more experienced.

Butt plugs and anal beads are an awesome place to start on your anal pleasure journey. These kinds of toys usually start of on the narrow side and get thicker towards the base of the toy. A good example is the Crystal Jellies Anal Starter.

Because of this you can comfortably use as much girth and depth as your body will allow. Check out the Shane's World Advanced Anal 101 Beads.



During The Act
Slow and steady is the pace you want to take to give yourself time to get used to the sensation. Slow and gentle but firm strokes will be easy enough to handle but with just the right pressure for pleasure. If you discover you or your partner needs a more aggressive approach then go for it.

Anal sex can be a completely exciting and pleasurable new way to enjoy your partner and to add to your sexual explorations. It is not for everyone so if you tried it and didn’t like it at least you gave it a go.

If, after your first experience, you’re in love… welcome to the world of anal sex!

Symone (AKA Kitty) is an aspiring sexologist and relationship therapist and is a freelance writer. She is extremely interested in the world of sexuality and finding ways to bring a more positive and open minded view to the world on the topic of sex.


Products mentioned in this article are as follows:

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